Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Another Lend a Line Poem

Emilio used my line to write the following poem. Thanks, Emilio! To read more of his work, please visit Fragments of Reality.


Like ice scraping against the glass, glass, glass
He moves reluctantly
Scuffing, lifting
The soles of his shoes
Along the boulevard

Finally reaching
The place to sleep
A little Volkswagen
Parked in the 24 hour
Grocery store lot

Leaning back
As far as he can
Instead of sleep
He thinks and weeps

Hearing the parking lot
Guard pass
His mind is screeching
Like ice scraping against
The glass


Sara said...

Instead of sleep
He thinks and weeps

Those lines are really powerful. I ove how this poem painted a picture that is very relatable to the average person, and yet also quite emotional.

punatik said...

One doesn't fall asleep immediately in a small car. This time, gave the subject a period to feel remorse for past and present inappropriate behavior.This poem is somewhat autobiographical, and it was a difficult and a very emotional time for me. Fortunately, this time is past.

Sara,thanks for your comment and encouragement, and an excellent 1st line.